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Unstoppable Women Series

Luja Mathema

Illustrations by Prakash Ranjit

Language: English & Nepali

Publisher: Nepa~laya

Published: 2024

Pages: Four books, around 30 pages each, Hardcover

Written by Elena Favilli and Francesca Cavallo, there’s a book (that can double as a great coffee table book) called ‘Goodnight Stories for Rebel Girls’ that features short stories about 100 real inspiring women who can be role models to children. It was published in 2016 and aimed at children six and up. Since then, it has sold over one million copies and been translated into more than 47 languages. 

The book has full-page illustrations of women like Ada Lovelace, Frida Kahlo, Malala Yousafzai, Greta Thunberg, Judy Blume etc. followed by their stories. It makes for a great book to read during bedtime or when you just want a bite-sized read. Though a fabulous book, there is a lack of representation since the book is primarily meant for a Western audience. There isn’t a single story about a Nepali woman in the two book series. But Nepa~laya’s ‘Unstoppable Women Series’, a collection of four books about various Nepali women bridges that gap. 

Featuring Ambika Shrestha, Ani Choying Drolma, Pasang Lhamu Sherpa, and Sapana Pradhan Malla, the series is a brilliant collection of stories of women who have excelled in their respective fields. Unlike Goodnight Stories for Rebel Girls, where each woman is confined to two pages, in the Unstoppable Women Series the four featured women all get their own beautifully illustrated books. Each hardcover book is about 30 pages long and the stories are narrated in both English and Nepali. 

The perfectly bound slim volumes take you on a journey through these amazing women’s lives, inspiring you to look at life a little differently. Tourism entrepreneur Ambika Shrestha’s life, from Sikkim, India to Nepal, is testimony of the powers of hard work and discipline. Buddhist nun and singer Ani Choying Drolma’s story speaks of the value of pursuing your life’s calling. Similarly, Pasang Lhamu Sherpa, the first Nepali woman to climb Mt. Everest, teaches you how grit and resilience can help you achieve the impossible. Sapana Pradhan Malla, a judge in the Nepali Supreme Court, is an advocate for equality. I made a friend’s daughter read her story and she told me she wants to be like Malla when she grows up. When I asked her what she meant by that, she said she wants to speak her mind and call out all the wrong things in our society. 

All the four books, despite being short, make you want to take your time with them. You will pause to look at the illustrations and when you finish one book, you don’t immediately want to jump onto the next, pausing instead to think about these women’s lives and compare and contrast your own or the lives of women you know with theirs. You realize how women in Nepal have been bound by societal expectations and challenges and yet continue to strive to forge their own paths. It makes you value them more and consider how things could be different, if society was as accepting of them as it is of men. 

All in all, the Unstoppable Women Series is a great collection to read with your children, or by yourself. It’s not just books for girls and women but for boys and men as well, as there are lots of life lessons to learn from these fabulous women who have braved a lot in life to change the world around them and make a name for themselves.

I must admit that I’m not a fan of non-fiction. I prefer fiction as it takes me to different worlds and allows me to live different lives, albeit vicariously. I also enjoy getting to know all these different people and characters, as in real life I’m not a very social person and my contact with people, outside family and work, is limited. I could say I’m more attached to fictional characters than real people. I also find that I’m a fast reader while reading fiction. Non-fiction needs a longer processing time and sometimes, I tend to want to cross-reference what I’ve just read with information available online and that takes me on a different path altogether. 

But that doesn’t mean I don’t read non-fiction. I’m a lot pickier than I am while choosing fiction titles. I have to be really drawn to the subject or need to have heard another fellow reader whose book choices I resonate with talk about it to pick up a non-fiction work. Usually, my husband recommends some titles he thinks I would enjoy as he mostly reads non-fiction. I also have a few colleagues who prefer non-fiction over fiction (I will never understand why) and they have suggested some really good books. So, over time, I’ve read quite a few non-fiction works. They might make for less than 10 percent of all the reading I have done in life till now but I’ve come across some really good works that I find myself picking up when I need some motivation. 

In February this year (which, I must mention, has been a good year of reading so far), I found myself leafing through some non-fiction titles, trying to pick up some helpful tips to restructure my life, get a mental grip on myself, become more attuned to my body and its needs, and generally live a more mindful and thus meaningful life. These were all books I had read in the past that had taught me quite a few life lessons. So, this week, as the month comes to an end, I thought I’d share a list of these books with you, hoping they might help bring comfort and perspective in your life when you need it the most. 

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

I read this book over a decade ago. It wasn’t even available at bookstores in Nepal and I ended up ordering a pricey copy from the US. I was intrigued by the title. The book is about the authors’ experiments in trying to lead a happier life. She breaks down the massive goal into achievable tasks by giving one month each to a certain area in her life. So in a particular month, if she’s trying to be more organized, in another she’s focusing on boosting energy. It’s not preachy like most self-help books and that’s what I liked the best about it. 

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner

Crying in H Mart is a memoir that was published in 2021. Michelle Zauner is a singer and guitarist of the band called Japanese Breakfast. The book is an expansion of an essay by Zauner that was published in The New Yorker in 2018. I had read the essay and there was a lot of hype surrounding the book. But I couldn’t bring myself to read it for a long time as it talks about the death of Zauner’s mother and grief is the main theme. But once I read it, I could help recommend it to people. It’s an honest portrayal of what losing a loved one looks like and teaches you to consider the idea of death in ways you haven’t before.  

Supercommunicators by Charles Duhigg 

This is a book that my husband recommended. He’s a huge fan of Charles Duhigg’s works and Supercommunicators is the author’s latest book. He thought it would be helpful if both of us read this book as it might make us communicate better in general and with each other as a couple. The book is an eye-opener on how we choose to communicate and why we often get it wrong. Duhigg teaches you how to recognize and respond to the emotion rather than being focused on what is being said and how. The book reveals the art and science of being an effective communicator. 

Atomic Habits by James Clear

I believe everyone has heard about or read this book. This was an instant bestseller when it came out in 2018, with the title being sold-out at most bookstores in Nepal. Even friends who didn’t read much otherwise were carrying this book around. This book presents a proven system for building good habits and breaking bad ones. It also presents the one percent rule, which is if you can get one percent better every day for a year, you will end up 37 times better by the end of the year. It focuses on the power of small habits in creating a lasting change in your life. 

When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi 

I don’t cry easily and this book made me sob like no other. An autobiographical work written by an American neurosurgeon Paul Kalanithi about his life while battling stage four metastatic lung cancer. He was just 36 years old. It was published posthumously and there’s an epilogue by his wife, Lucy, that’s just heartbreaking. But as sad as the story is, the book actually gives a hopeful message. It’s about finding beauty and hope even when the odds are stacked against you. There’s also lots about his medical training days that gives you insight into the world of medicine and how hard doctors work to provide their patients the best possible care.

A New Earth by Ekharte Tolle 

This book was chosen twice by Oprah Winfrey for her book club so that speaks volumes about how good the book actually is. In fact, it’s a book that people of all ages can read in order to live a better life. The book has a lot of basic concepts that you might already be familiar with but it presents them in a way that makes you think about them and incorporate them in your daily life. For example, being present in the moment is something we all know we should do but how often do we do it? Tolle shows you why it’s important but doesn’t offer instructions. A New Earth is basically a guide to becoming your best self while allowing you to do it in your own way. 

Wisdom of the Gods for You and Me by Devdutt Pattanaik 

Devdutt Pattanaik is one of my favorite authors. He writes on mythology and breaks down complex religious concepts to make it interesting and palatable. The first book that got me hooked to his works was My Hanuman Chalisa. I read Shikhandi and Other Tales They Don’t Tell You next which was an exploration of queerness in Hinduism and there was really no looking back. I think I have read most of his works but Wisdom of the Gods for You and Me is the one I reach for every now and then when I need some mental clarity. It soothes and calms me down. It makes me feel less emotionally overwhelmed. I think everyone could benefit from some spiritual guidance and this book is just perfect for it. 

The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

This is an easy book to dip in and out of. It has 366 short chapters, each of which is just a page long. It’s a beautifully compiled daily meditations on stoic wisdom that’s designed to make you happier, resilient, and virtuous. Philosophy books are usually heavy and preachy but The Daily Stoic is an easy guide to understand stoicism and benefit from it. It teaches you how you can approach your problems, work, and relationships by first quoting what famous philosophers have said and then interpreting them in simple ways. It will help you understand how to deal with things that aren’t in your control. 

Exile by Taslima Nasrin

Taslima Nasrin is a Bangladeshi writer, physician, feminist, and activist. She’s known for writing about women’s oppression and the different issues with religion as well as for her memoir Lajja which means shame in English. Exile was published in 2016 and is the author’s experiences during her exile from Bangladesh in 2007 and 2008. Exile is a difficult but important book to read that makes you think about all the things you take for granted in life, like freedom, routine, and even something as basic as having a place to call home. The book also has poems and journal entries that Nasrin wrote during her exile that shed light on her mental state during the difficult time. 

Triumph of the Heart by Megan Feldman Bettencourt 

Human beings tend to hold a lot of grudges. It’s perhaps our most common failing. But, if you think about it, it does us a lot of harm. Our grudges hold us back and make us sad and bitter. Oftentimes, our relationships suffer and so does our self-esteem. In Triumph of the Heart, Megan Feldman Bettencourt shows how and why forgiving is the easier thing to do. Giving the example of a father who forgave the man who murdered his son, Bettencourt explores the benefits of forgiveness both from a scientific perspective and a human one. It’s the most eye-opening, uplifting book I’ve read and I think it really changed the way I deal with things in life. 

In contemporary Nepali society, there is a widespread belief that honest politicians are essential for progress. While Nepal has historically been home to many selfless and dedicated leaders, the country still lacks politicians who approach politics with a sense of sacrifice, prioritizing the nation and its citizens above all else. Mahendra Narayan Nidhi stands out as one such rare figure. Kishore Nepal’s book, Nepal Kaa Nidhi, made it easier to capture the essence of Nidhi’s personality and contributions in this narrative.

A practitioner of Gandhian ideals

Mahendra Narayan Nidhi was born in February 1922 into a prominent family in Nagarain, a village located about 14 kilometers south of Janakpur near the Indian border. Despite his family’s comfortable financial standing, his upbringing mirrored that of an average child in the Madhesi community. With no schools in Nagarain or nearby villages, Nidhi was unable to attend formal education during his early years. His father, Rajeshwar Nidhi, taught him the basics of literacy at home. After primary education, Nidhi studied Sanskrit under the guidance of priests in the neighboring village of Jatahi. Later, he familiarized himself with the laws and regulations of Nepal’s judicial system before joining his father in business. Through his travels to various villages for work, Nidhi gained a deep understanding of the realities of Madhesi society.

Despite lacking a formal degree, Nidhi developed a strong sense of social awareness early on. His leadership journey began after the Nepali Congress’s Janakpur convention in 1953, where he played a pivotal role in expanding the party’s organizational reach in the Mahottari region.

Nidhi is often regarded as one of Nepal’s Gandhian leaders. Inspired by Gandhi’s independence movement in India and influenced by leaders like Jayaprakash Narayan (JP) and Ram Manohar Lohia, Nidhi entered politics with a vision to rebuild Nepal on the principles of truth and non-violence, starting from the grassroots level. Like Gandhi, he embraced satyagraha (non-violent resistance) as a powerful tool in his political struggles. From 1947 onward, Nidhi actively promoted satyagraha and was arrested in 1957 for participating in such movements.

December 15, 1960, marks a dark chapter in Nepal’s history when King Mahendra seized absolute power, dismantling the democratic system. In response, the Nepali Congress, based in Patna, resolved to launch an armed struggle. However, Nidhi remained steadfast in his commitment to non-violence. He believed that a true satyagrahi should embody qualities such as fearlessness, self-discipline, and restraint, which he demonstrated through his actions rather than mere words. Upon returning to Nepal, Nidhi openly opposed the politics of violence and was subsequently imprisoned. His unwavering adherence to non-violence, even in the face of adversity, highlighted his idealism and moral courage.

A bold and visionary leader

In 1964, during a program organized by the Panchayati government in Janakpur, Nidhi boldly stated, “Writing laws and regulations alone cannot bring change to our country; they must be implemented truthfully.” He fearlessly criticized the Panchayat regime’s education policy in 1971, advocating for education in one’s mother tongue—a demand that remains relevant today.

In 1976, when B.P. Koirala and Ganeshman Singh returned to Nepal, embracing national unity and reconciliation, the Nepali Congress faced internal strife. At a central working committee meeting in Calcutta, presided over by Suvarna Samsher, B.P. Koirala was expelled from the party. Girija Prasad Koirala organized a conference in Patna to oppose this decision, and Nidhi played a crucial role in resolving the conflict. He argued that expelling a leader of B.P.’s stature could not be decided unilaterally. After meeting Suvarna Samsher in Calcutta, Nidhi convinced him to hand over the party’s leadership to B.P., thereby preventing the Congress from descending into division and mistrust. Kishore Nepal, in his book Nepal Kaa Nidhi, emphasizes that Nidhi’s wisdom and diplomacy saved the party during a critical juncture.

During the interim government of 1990, Nidhi served as the Minister of Water Resources and Local Development at the request of Prime Minister Krishna Prasad Bhattarai. As the Minister of Local Development, he dismantled the Panchayat-era structures and established Village Development Committees and District Development Committees. He also advocated against introducing party politics in local body elections, warning that it would divide communities—a vision that remains unaddressed to this day. As the Minister of Water Resources, Nidhi revived the Nepal-India Joint Committee meetings on the Koshi and Gandaki rivers, which had been stalled for years. His innovative approach led to concrete decisions on the Kulekhani hydroelectric projects and an agreement to sell Nepal’s surplus electricity to India without incurring losses—a policy that continues to be a source of economic pride for Nepal.

A humble and unforgettable legacy

Mahendra Narayan Nidhi was a down-to-earth leader whose influence on Nepal’s political history remains indelible. He refrained from engaging in internal party rivalries, even when others sought to split the Nepali Congress for personal gain. The late Pradeep Giri once remarked on Nidhi’s unique intellectualism: “Some intellectuals derive their ideas from the works of Marx, Lenin, Gandhi, or Gramsci, while others form their ideas by observing people, understanding their needs, and responding to them. Mahendra Narayan Nidhi belonged to the latter category.”

Nidhi’s legacy is a testament to his unwavering commitment to truth, non-violence, and the welfare of the nation. His life and work continue to inspire future generations of leaders in Nepal.

Out of the many bookstores in Kathmandu and Lalitpur that I visit frequently, I find the one at Patandhoka, Lalitpur, called ‘Patan Book Shop’ to be the most useful and interesting. It’s a small space but the collection it has is simply amazing. There are shelves upon shelves filled with books as well as books piled high on stools, benches, and tables. It’s a little out of the way and I struggle with parking in the area so I don’t visit it as often as I would like to but whenever I can’t find a book or I want to discover some new titles or authors, I make it a point to go there.

I think I can easily spend a few hours at this bookstore. If you go there, just don’t browse through their new releases section. Take your time to go through the shelves. You will definitely come across some treasures. I found ‘A Mirror Made of Rain’ by Naheed Phiroze Patel here. I hadn’t heard about the author or the title and the cover art and the blurb both caught my attention. The fact that the book was dedicated to the author’s father, Phiroze, who, she says, would always find a kind word for anybody who needed one made me unable to put it down. I feel first novels and those dedicated to parents hold a lot of promise as there’s a lot at stake there.

The story is about Noomi Wadia, a young woman with a fraught relationship with her mother. Her father, Jeh, is supportive and she’s close to him but her mother has mental health issues and is also battling alcoholism. Noomi spends most of her childhood and teenage years fearing her mother and, along with Jeh, trying to get Asha to stop drinking. It takes a lot of her energy and time. But alcoholism is a tricky and difficult situation. No one and nothing can force an alcoholic to stop drinking. It puts a lot of strain on a family. Eventually, Noomi finds herself unable to cope and leaves home.

Years later, she’s all set to get married to Veer, someone she met at a pub and felt an instant connection with. But Noomi has inherited her mother’s self-destructive behaviors. She’s unable to cope in high pressure situations without a drink to calm her nerves. She, like everyone who enjoys alcohol a little too much, thinks she has it under control. But she carries miniature vodka bottles in her handbag and can never stop at one or two drinks at parties. Soon, she realizes she must control her impulses or risk everything she loves.

While I was reading A Mirror Made of Rain, I was unable to think of much else. The story and Noomi, Jeh, and Asha were on my mind all the time. It’s a dark and disturbing novel about what addiction can do to a family and how every person has his/her way of dealing with the trauma. The author has fleshed out the characters really well and you can see what drives them to do the things they do and empathize with them. Even the relatives and friends, who make occasional appearances, are apt depictions of our overly curious to the point of intrusive society.

All in all, A Mirror Made of Rain is a brave and unflinching story that deserved to be told. It’s a reminder of the fact that the most potent sorrows and sufferings are often generational and that children who see too much of it early on carry battle wounds of sorts for the rest of their lives, and that their perception of love is perhaps forever skewed. A word of caution though: Peppered with Hindi words and phrases, reading this book can sometimes be a bit jarring, especially if you aren’t familiar with the culture and its slangs but it’s just a minor hiccup. 

A Mirror Made of Rain

Naheed Phiroze Patel

Published: 2021

Publisher: Fourth Estate

Pages: 285, Paperback