Mind Matters | Generation gap

I’m a college student and I have a job as well. Whenever I have some free time, I like to sleep or scroll through social media. My parents have a problem with it. They think I’m neglecting my studies. But I’m also using my phone for college and work. Also, technology isn’t necessarily bad. I don’t like it when my parents misunderstand me. How can I bridge this communication gap and make them understand that modern technology can align with traditional values? 

Answered by Kapil Sharma, counseling psychologist

I’m going to assume you are in your late teens or early 20s as this kind of problem is more common in that age group. What you are facing is more likely to be a perception vs reality situation. Your parents think social media can harm you but it might be helping you deal with everyday pressures. What you can do here is share how you feel and how social media or technology is helping you in your studies, work, and personal life. 

Generational gap can lead to many problems in the family, especially where technology is concerned. They didn’t have access to it during their times so it will take them a while to get used to it and start seeing its advantages. You can reassure them that you won’t let it hamper your studies or career. Try sharing how you feel it helps you and they might slowly start understanding. 

It can also be a good idea to acknowledge their concerns and appreciate their advice. This way they will feel like you are hearing them out and not dismissing them. In the process, you can also share your thoughts and communicate why you do the things you do so that they get an insight into the workings of your mind as well. 

Try to involve them when you are using the internet. If you are watching something on YouTube, maybe you can get them to watch it with you. Ask them what they would like to watch and tell them what you are interested in. Sharing interests can lead to open communication and a better understanding of one another. 

Every parent worries about their child. Yours too are just looking out for you. In this case, if you are open and honest with them, they will eventually come around. The key is sharing how you feel and explaining things to them.