Query I’m a 19-year-old student and I suffer from impostor syndrome. I lack confidence and every time I try to achieve something or be productive, I always question my potential. So much so that I refrain from taking up any opportunities that I know are good for my future. I feel like I will fail in whatever I do. This insecurity has led me to believe I’m not good enough and everything I do is worthless. My studies are being hampered and I’m unable to do even the simplest task that I’m assigned. I get nervous and sweaty and I can’t breathe. Everything feels fuzzy and I feel like I will collapse if I have to take on any more responsibilities. How do I cope with this? Please help!—A nervous fella Kapil Sharma, counseling psychologist, Nepal Institute of Mental Health

First thing I want you to do is acknowledge everything you have been feeling. You have mentioned that this imposter feeling has brought about a lot of self-doubt and feeling of incompetence. It’s obvious that it has caused a lot of problems in your emotional wellbeing and overall performance. 

One thing you need to do is identify what kind of imposter syndrome you have been dealing with. Only then can we proceed towards the solution by customizing the steps to deal with your problem. Some of the types of imposters are perfectionists, experts, soloists, natural geniuses, and super humans. Finding out which category you belong to is very essential to determine what you need to do to overcome it.  Secondly, you can’t let your experiences or moments of doubt control you. Remember this feeling is momentary. It’s not your whole life. It will pass. There are a few things you can follow through to make things better for yourself. Stop fighting what you feel and start acknowledging it. Question your thoughts and identify if they are rational or not. You can also go on to do a SWOT (Strength, Weakness, Obstacle, Threat) analysis to assess your abilities. That will help you be clear of what you are capable of and not just feel incompetant like you mentioned. It will also help you identify what triggers your feelings of being an imposter.  Also, stop comparing yourself to others. It’s easier said than done but remember everyone has their own set of skills and own growth graph. Comparing yourself with everyone else will only hurt your growth. Move forwards with baby steps, if you must. A gradual progression is still a progression.  It will help a lot of you find someone to talk to about the way you feel. Sharing feelings and building connections will help you gain a new perspective into your personality. It will definitely be something different from what you think of yourself.  Lastly, it’s okay to seek professional help if you feel like you are stuck while trying to get over this feeling of being an imposter. Psychologists and counselors are always there to guide and help you through the process of healing.