In our society, humor often serves as a mask, allowing people to navigate uncomfortable topics. However, when it comes to casual jokes about rape, sexual violence, or harassment, the consequences can be deeply harmful. These jokes are not isolated incidents; they are part of a broader cultural pattern that has normalized hurtful humor for far too long.

The so-called rape culture refers to a societal environment where sexual violence is trivialized, excused, or even normalized. It encompasses a range of beliefs and practices that perpetuate sexual objectification, the use of misogynistic language, victim-blaming, and the minimization of severity. The language of rape culture is woven into our everyday conversations—whether in casual chats among friends, jokes on social media, family gatherings, or even catcalling on the streets. These offensive remarks don’t occur in the shadows; they happen in broad daylight, often glorified or dismissed as harmless.

Societal structure

We live in a society where rape and sexual violence are compared to clapping hands—as if it takes two to tango. This mindset denies the reality that it is never the victim’s choice to be victimized; it is always the abuser’s choice to abuse. Yet, victims are often chewed up, spat out, and left to fend for themselves, while abusers are excused, justified, and even condoned. Common comments like, “She was asking for it with that outfit,” “She’s too pretty to be single,” or “She must have lots of guys after her,” reveal how deeply ingrained these attitudes are. Such statements tie women’s worth to male attention and objectification, showing how easily harmful humor is accepted and how poorly we understand sexual assault.

These jokes and comments are not just words—they have lasting impacts on the mind, spirit, and body. For some, they may seem like a minute of laughter, but for others, they can lead to lifelong trauma, feelings of shame, guilt, fear, and isolation. The problem lies not in the joke itself, but in its normalization. Every time someone cracks a rape joke and others laugh along, it sends a message that sexual assault is something to be joked about—something acceptable, even funny. This normalization creates an environment where victims are less likely to report incidents or speak up, fearing societal judgment and backlash. It’s crucial to remember that it is not the victim’s responsibility to fix these situations; it is society’s responsibility to create an environment where victims are believed, supported, and not judged. No one asks for or deserves such violence.

Negative side of social media

In the modern era, social media plays a significant role in shaping societal attitudes and perceptions. Unfortunately, it also perpetuates the language of rape culture—whether through memes, posts joking about sexual violence, derogatory terms in online conversations, or influencers who trivialize these issues. Movies and TV shows often depict sexual violence as a plot twist or something unserious, reinforcing stereotypes of masculinity and femininity. Women are portrayed as soft, dependent, and vulnerable, while men are shown as powerful and entitled to women’s bodies. Social media often blames victims for assaults based on their behavior or appearance, making character assassination and slut-shaming easier than ever. This has created a toxic influence on society, further entrenching harmful norms.

Nepal and so-called rape culture

In Nepal, a country built on a patriarchal social structure, women are often placed in subordinate positions, limiting their power and autonomy. Men are frequently portrayed as inherently predatory, while women are depicted as passive or overly sexualized. This dynamic has made it easier to adopt misogynistic language and behaviors. The caste system further complicates the issue, as marginalized groups face disproportionately higher risks of violence and often lack social support. According to the Nepal Police Headquarters Annual Fact Sheet for the fiscal year 2023/24, 3,441 cases of sexual violence were registered. Despite strict laws against rape and sexual violence under the Muluki Criminal Code (2074), enforcement remains inconsistent. The traces of rape culture in Nepal are evident, whether in the form of historical societal norms or today’s casual jokes and humor.

Solutions

As we navigate our daily interactions, it’s high time to recognize the power of language and the impact of our words. To challenge harmful jokes, we must speak out when we hear someone trivializing rape or making offensive comments. We need to stand firm against inappropriate humor and actively promote consent and respect. Encouraging jokes that empower rather than hurt can foster an environment where everyone feels safe and valued. Social media can be a powerful tool for activism, raising awareness, and providing a safe space for survivors to share their stories, rather than a platform for bullying or perpetuating harmful stereotypes.

 

Let’s critically analyze the jokes we tell and hear, breaking down the everyday language of rape culture. By doing so, we can create a society where respect and empathy prevail, and where no one has to endure the trauma of being silenced or shamed.