In Boston, Massachusetts, US, Rukmini Karki works as a senior advocate for the Asian Task Force For Domestic Violence (ATASK), a group that helps Asian victims of domestic violence. She is one of the most well-known figures in the Asian community in the US for her steadfast support for women’s empowerment and social justice.
Karki, who is of Nepali descent and was raised in India, became involved in social justice advocacy after observing various forms of cultural inequality in the society. Since 1997, she has advocated for human rights, women’s rights, and gender equality. She has a degree in law and a master’s in sociology and anthropology.
After she returned to Nepal, she began working for Plan International, where she spent four years promoting girl’s education and women’s empowerment. She worked on several gender action plans and gender equity projects like the Third Livestock Development Project before moving to the US in 2005. With nine years of experience, getting a job at ATASK was a breeze.
“Domestic abuse is particularly not seen as violence in Nepal,” says Karki as she reflects on her time working for gender equality in Nepal. “The use of physical force such as kicking or beating enjoys a strange kind of acceptance.” Immigrants from Nepal and other countries who live in the United States experience a range of abuse and violence. In the US, she says, domestic violence is a heinous crime. Karki fights for social change and tries to eliminate linguistic and cultural gaps in Asian communities. She is proficient in six languages, including Nepali, English, Hindi, Urdu, Bhojpuri, and Manipuri making her a valuable asset at ATASK as she can connect with non-English speakers caught in abusive relationships.
“Domestic violence is all about power and control. It can happen to anyone and it has no gender, age, or color bar,” says Karki, adding that violence doesn’t always mean physical abuse but encompasses emotional and psychological abuse as well. Based on her experience, she says that the majority of cases involve dependent visa holders, notably wives who are subjected to abuse and are threatened with deportation by their spouses. A large number of crimes go unreported because the women are anxious about their perceived inferior social and economic status in society.
Karki says domestic violence isn’t as pervasive as it is in Nepal since the process of justice is backed and subsidized by the government. She has a strong network with the government, police, medical community, legal community, and other service providers to support victims who have been physically hurt or emotionally traumatized.
Karki shares the story of one of her most striking cases, involving an Indian woman who got the helpline number of ATASK through doctors. The victim’s husband tortured her for five years. Karki was shocked to know that the victim was kept inside the house, she had never seen a one-dollar bill and she knew little about American life. Karki taught her everything about the bus system, Uber, and other daily activities. Also, she helped her get a restraining order against her spouse.
Apart from that, she and her team have continuously assisted many people by offering free English language classes and government housing for victims during the transitional period. In cases that involve child custody, they have offered victims free attorney services, if they are unable to pay for one. What sets her team apart is knowledge about the victim’s culture and language, their focus on bridging the gap, and unequivocal and emotional support through awareness and education
With technological developments, she says, their reach has increased. She recalls how someone found her on TikTok. However, she does not always believe that technology is as helpful as it’s made out to be. She has been stalked by the abuser of one of the victims. Having learned from the experience, she now keeps herself on high alert to deal with any potential issues. “I’m not afraid of them because this is what I have chosen to do and helping others makes me happy,” she says. But she is often at the receiving end of a lot of animosity. She says, “I have been falsely accused of destroying families and relationships.”
She has been assisting numerous Nepalis living in the US and wants to connect with victims to provide the resources she has access to. She has also collaborated with the Centre for Women’s Awareness and Development (CWAD) to assist divorced Nepali women in claiming generational property.
Karki believes that the current lot of Nepali women leaders are incredibly strong and she values their contribution to social justice. But she also thinks there is no consistency in the fight against violence or support for the victims. As a senior advocate, she encourages everyone, especially those in positions of power, to continue with the struggle until the bitter end, regardless of the outcome.
The public, she says, should be given enough information about their rights and government initiatives about laws regarding gender-based violence. The government of Nepal should allocate a separate budget to assist victims of violence, she says. Most importantly, she wishes for a society where victims of violence can speak without inhibition. “Silence is another form of self-harm. No matter how challenging a situation might be, there are countless alternatives and resources available for support,” she says.
