Some stories stay with you no matter how long ago you read them. For me, “Not Without My Daughter” by Betty Mahmoody is that story. I read it when I was in high school and have never revisited it as it’s just too painful. But I can recall everything about it as if I only recently read it. This is the book that instantly comes to mind when someone asks me for a recommendation or to list my favorites.
The book narrates how a two-week family holiday in Tehran, Iran became a two-year battle for freedom. Though it ultimately ends in a daring escape, Betty’s account of how her Iranian-born husband duped her into visiting his homeland and then kept her and their daughter, Mahtob, prisoners within his family home is harrowing and, quite frankly, makes you weep.
Betty married Dr Sayyed Bozorg Mahmoody in 1977 and the couple lived in Alpena, Michigan. Everything is perfect in their marriage up until her husband convinces her to go to Iran with him for a ‘short trip’. Once the promised two weeks are over, Sayyed refuses to return to the US and takes away his wife’s passport so that she too can’t go back home.

From 1984 to 1986, Betty and Mahtob, who was four when she left the US to visit her father’s home country, were held in Iran against their will. During this time, Sayyed becomes increasingly abusive and his family too make life difficult for Betty, insisting she stay inside at all times, and wear the chador if she absolutely has to go out. Her husband threatens to kill her if she leaves or, worse, take Mahtob away from him.
The book details Betty’s escape to Turkey with her daughter, through the snowy Iranian mountains—a journey of 800 km—with the help of many Iranians she meets along the way, and it even reads like a thriller in bits and pieces. The book also narrates Betty’s struggle to understand how her husband suddenly turned into a monster, as well as how she shielded Mahtob from all that was happening around her.
Fortunately, Betty makes it back to the US in 1986 and files for divorce.
However, there’s that lingering fear that Sayyed is on their trail and will manage to hunt them down and kill them, just as he promised. For years after their return, Mahtob played with an alarm button around her neck and Betty carried a gun. They lived under assumed names and kept their past a secret, until Betty wrote Not Without My Daughter and it was made into a film in 1991.
I have to admit that Not Without My Daughter isn’t well written. But then again it doesn’t matter. You will find yourself cheering for Betty as she plans her escape and, all the while, you are reminded of a mother’s unwavering love for her child.