Mind Matters | She copies everything I do

I am 24 years old and I’m doing my bachelors. I have a ‘friend’ who copies everything I do. It started with small things like the way I dress and the way I write and speak and slowly escalated to her copying my habits and likes and dislikes. Today, she looks, sounds, and behaves like me. Others have noticed it too and think there is something wrong with it all. I am creeped out too but don’t know how to distance myself from her. Should I be worried? How should I deal with this?

Answered by Aapur Sijapati, psychology student, intern at Happy Minds

While it might sound surprising, this situation is something a lot of people go through. It often stays hidden because they’re scared of being seen as self-centered or full of themselves. At first, most people just deny that it’s even happening. It’s hard to believe that someone might be intentionally copying everything that you are doing and the chances of it being a coincidence feel much higher.

Most people also feel and assume their lives and choices are too ordinary to be worth copying and idolizing, unlike celebrities whose seemingly perfect lifestyles make them more obvious targets for admiration and imitation.  But it’s essential to know that regardless of how normal our lives might be for ourselves, some people might have a tendency to desire it. 

While certain levels of social mimicry are considered to be normal and done subconsciously like imitating certain lingo or hand gestures, the extremities vary. In this particular case, the fact that it’s obvious to those around her  shows that this behavior had been going on for quite some time. It also indicates that it’s time to do something about it.

In order to avoid victim blaming that is a feeling you might be doing something that is causing this or that it is your fault for having someone in your life who copies you, it’s important to try and understand what might be causing the friend to do this.

Oftentimes, confrontation might lead to guilt, which would make rationally dealing with this situation even more complicated. Some reasons that may be causing this could be the friend dealing with her own internal insecurities and self esteem issues that make her feel like she is not good enough. It might also be a way to create a sense of belongingness in a social setting where it is easier to copy someone who is already a part of the group than create a space for herself. Finally, in extreme cases, it could point towards malicious intentions and be signs of stalking. 

There could be many reasons why people do such things but the reasons and feelings don’t invalidate the insecurity and lack of safety that the individual who is being copied goes through. It’s important to know that it's not your responsibility to keep her sense of belongingness intact at the expense of your own wellbeing or sense of safety.

One important step in situations like this is figuring out whether the discomfort is mainly caused by the other person’s actions or by other people pointing them out. Ask yourself, what is really affecting you, is it her actions alone, or the growing awareness sparked by others pointing them out? This kind of reflection helps in understanding what exactly feels upsetting and can make it easier to decide what to do next. It’s also useful to think about whether it’s more practical to create some distance or to have a respectful conversation. If distance seems like the better option, how often you see each other matters. Changing that might mean adjusting daily routines or even risking mutual friendships. 

On the other hand, a calm and honest conversation might help clear the air and lead to better understanding. While this approach might offer more clarity and help in humanizing the friend, it can also be an uncomfortable step—one that requires emotional readiness for a potentially intense reaction. Still, it’s important to remember that in the case of a negative response, you can’t be held responsible for the other person’s mental or emotional state.

In the end, dealing with someone who copies your behavior too closely can be confusing and emotionally draining. Whether the choice is to take some space, have an honest conversation, or simply reflect more deeply, the most important thing is to protect your sense of safety and comfort. Noticing and speaking up about it doesn’t mean being self-centered—it means being aware and taking care of yourself.

Nepal’s changing demographics

While overpopulation is often linked to resource scarcity, unemployment, and inequality, real solutions lie beyond memorizing statistics. Meaningful progress comes from engaging youth through practical, creative education—like gamified learning and field-based experiences. ApEx spoke to three people to understand Nepal’s demographic changes, innovation, and responsibility.

Soniya Bhetuwal, 19

Population growth impacts social, economic, and environmental systems, leading to challenges like resource scarcity, unemployment, and inequality. While often viewed negatively, it also brings opportunities such as increased labor and innovation. To address population issues effectively, education must move beyond traditional methods—using interactive, practical tools like field trips and digital learning to engage students meaningfully. A smart, informed society requires investment in data-driven planning, frugal innovation, and sustainable urban development. Governments must also create open feedback systems to ensure policies meet people’s real needs and foster inclusive decision-making.

Pravash Pandey, 29

Nepal’s population is growing at its slowest rate in 80 years—just 0.92 percent annually—but the effects remain significant. Cities are overcrowded, rural areas see a decline in population, and many youth are migrating abroad. With a fertility rate below replacement level (1.9), Nepal is heading toward population aging, which could strain healthcare, social support, and the economy.
Education—especially for women and rural communities—has helped lower birth rates and can empower people to make informed choices. However, more needs to be done. Education should include life skills, reproductive health, financial literacy, and climate awareness.
Nepal is currently in a ‘demographic window,’ with a high working-age population. This is a crucial time to invest in education, healthcare, job creation, and infrastructure. Migration shouldn’t be the only option. Opportunities must be created at home. Sustainable development must balance growth with environmental protection. Clean energy, sustainable farming, and inclusive policies are essential for lasting progress.

Anup Jung Pandey, 33

Population growth is changing our lives by making cities denser, increasing competition for jobs and resources. It is creating new demands and also driving innovation to meet new demands.

Education is key, it empowers individuals to make wise choices and teaches them to face challenges like resource scarcity, and cultivates the innovation needed for social welfare. Developing nations can grow sustainably by investing in people’s health and education, managing resources wisely, diversifying their economies, strengthening transparent governance, and ensuring that the economy benefits all citizens fairly.

Someone who has already become president entering politics is a serious issue: PM Oli

Prime minister and CPN-UML Chairman KP Sharma Oli has said that a person who has already become the President entering politics is a serious issue.During a politburo meeting held at the party office in Chyasal on Friday, he said that a person who has reached a prestigious position in the country and has become the Supreme Commander of the Nepal Army, entering politics is a serious issue.

According to Publicity Department Chief Rajendra Gautam, Chairman Oli had said that the party would take a decision on former President Bidya Devi Bhandari at the appropriate time.

A few days ago, ruling Nepali Congress President Sher Bahadur Deuba held a meeting with Prime Minister Oli and expressed his objection to former President Bhandari entering into politics.

Former President Bhandari announced her return to active UML politics on June 28.

North Korea bans foreigners from seaside resort weeks after opening

North Korea has temporarily banned foreign tourists from its newly opened Wonsan Kalma Coastal Tourist Zone, despite earlier plans to welcome international visitors.

The seaside resort, launched on 1 July as part of Kim Jong Un’s tourism push, recently hosted Russian tourists and received praise from Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov during his visit. Direct flights between Moscow and Pyongyang are expected soon, BBC reported.

Spanning 4km of beachfront, the resort features hotels, restaurants, and a water park. However, rights groups have criticised alleged forced labour during its construction.

North Korea briefly reopened to foreign tourists earlier this year but halted visits without explanation, according to BBC.

At Least 30 killed in Israeli strikes across Gaza

Israeli airstrikes killed at least 30 Palestinians across Gaza on Friday, according to Al Jazeera.

Among the dead were civilians in Gaza City’s Tuffah area, Jabalia in the north, and al-Mawasi in the south—previously marked a “safe zone”—where tents sheltering displaced families were hit, killing at least five, including infants.

Seven others were killed while seeking aid. Many wounded, including children, were taken to Nasser Hospital with injuries linked to drone attacks.

Al Jazeera’s Hani Mahmoud reported a rise in strikes using shrapnel-packed drone missiles targeting crowded areas, raising concerns over Israel’s claims of precision.

Israel to increase defense budget by $12.5bn

Israel will raise its defense budget by 42bn shekels (about $12.5bn) for 2025–2026, the finance and defense ministries announced Thursday.

The funding will support urgent military needs and strengthen security amid ongoing conflicts. Finance Minister Bezalel Smotrich said the budget covers operations in Gaza and preparations for wider threats, Xinhua reported.

Defense spending currently stands at 110bn shekels—around 9 percent of Israel’s GDP.

Since resuming its Gaza offensive on March 18, over 7,800 Palestinians have been killed, bringing the total death toll to nearly 59,000, according to Gaza health officials. The conflict began after the October 7, 2023 Hamas-led attack that killed 1,200 people in Israel, according to Xinhua.

RCB blamed for deadly stampede after IPL victory parade

Karnataka state authorities have blamed Royal Challengers Bengaluru (RCB) and its partners for a fatal stampede during last month’s IPL victory celebrations, Al Jazeera reported.

According to a report released Thursday, the team held a parade in Bengaluru on June 4 without formal police permission, despite a rejected request. The event drew massive crowds near M Chinnaswamy Stadium, resulting in a stampede that killed 11 people, aged 14 to 29, and injured over 50 others.

The report cited poor planning and lack of coordination by RCB, event organisers DNA, and the state cricket association. Four individuals, including a senior RCB executive, have been detained in connection with the incident, according to Al Jazeera.

RCB has not commented on the findings.

South Korean court rejects Former President Yoon’s release request

A South Korean court on Friday denied former President Yoon Suk-yeol’s request for release, keeping him in custody amid an ongoing investigation into his failed martial law attempt, Reuters reported.

The Seoul Central District Court upheld the legality of Yoon’s detention, which stems from charges including insurrection, abuse of power, and falsifying documents. The investigation, led by Special Counsel Cho Eun-suk, began in June.

Yoon was impeached in April after the Constitutional Court found his martial law push unconstitutional.